#sierra-leone, #the human-condition, #thoughts, Uncategorized

Manipulation or Kindness


There are some things that just have to be dished out from the mind, words mostly give wings to thoughts after a period of introspection . Maybe, as humans the conclusions we form from our thoughts and experiences determines the person we are or become. 

It’s like a jigsaw puzzle with pieces scattered and some in place , yet with each attempt at forming the complete image we either get closer to getting it right by placing the right piece in the correct part, or we use the wrong piece which steers us in the wrong direction.

This not a piece on jigsaws (lol) but the analogy between it and life is not lost to many. The human condition has always being centered on the prevaling theme to try and make a sense of things, primarily the existential questions about the purpose of life, thus the many belief systems and diverse philosophies .

From the past decades to now, there has been a heightened acceleration in modern culture to push to individuals the idea of manipulative self centeredness as paramount, whilst eroding the need to do genuine act of kindness; from music, movies, literary works to political and social circles. These messages somehow place more emphasis that the keys to success for a better status in society is based on the individual’s chameleon ‘Fouche~like’ attitude to switch loyalties based on what is beneficial to him/her without a moral compass . In essence it’s a ‘Me Only ‘ world. 

The world has never been for the meek, yet there has always been a sense of duty of giving a helping hand to others in need , even in dark places. These days, however, it’s an age of the top dog. The need to scheme in every situation, to unhealthily compete in trivial matters or to be a ‘savage’ at the expense of others is all borne out of the need to dominate. 

It’s a world of half truths , selective kindness and lies. Family dynamics is no better than workplace politics that pits people against each other and condones betrayals whilst it laughs at loyalty as an antiquated relic.

It’s no wonder everyone wants to be a ‘savage’ these days.

 The insecurity of lack of trust in romantic relationships stems from the fact that couples nowadays all have motives and keep their proverbial cards close to their chest.  

It’s like the lyrics from a Chris Brown song;

“Seems like ain’t nothing cool about being real, no one’s honest about what they feel”

It seems modern culture has deemed being good as unfashionable, as such even its potrayal in contemporary art is one tied to docile weakness,  yet we see a growing trend in the ‘humanising’ of historical/fictional villains in films, tv series and movies with a romanticising factor of making them look shrewd and smart. Glorifying their charm whilst painting their vile acts with epic spins.

Most entrepreneur and motivational books sell the idea of a thirst to dominate bordering on almost a narcissistic view to crush and manipulate to get to the top.

Mainstream music is no better, uplifting and conscious soundtracks do poorly compared to songs which extol the predator rise to the top and hedonist concepts. The cheating , ‘sideguy or sidechick’, and the savage unemotional personas all plays a role in a cycle of art imitating life and life imitating art.

The global political climate lately reeks of intolerance, from bigotry to refugee crisis, terrorism and the rise of demagogs who roll out divisive messages . 

The internet especially social media for all its positives sadly gave birth to cyber bullying and trolling which has been a hot bed of controversies and pervasive behaviour which along with con hacking fraudsters has sadly led to unfortunate cases, but like every tool it can be used for good purposes or manipulated to negative uses.

There’s just one Earth. 

Mars is yet to house a plant.

Manipulation comes from the need to need to control, not from the same source to excel. There’s nothing wrong with having an ambition to succeed, on the contrary it’s an admirable trait but there is something fundamentally wrong with doing so at the expense of using manipulative means to achieving it by crushing the dreams of others. Isn’t it? 

Yet, complacency and a tendency to be too kind to a fault is a flaw, there is a place and time to know when and how to act for your own good and interest. He who aims to please everyone will always fail, the fact is, an excess of free handouts is not the mark of goodwill but an insecure need to get validation. 

In a world that’s already unbalanced, little acts of kindness is all that gets us by. It’s less idealism and more a search within. 

Most, if not all of us in one way or another is guilty of falling victim to the sometimes negative influences of society , no one is impervious to it. At the same time we all can in one way or another erode the rash impulse to conform to norms that we know deep within leads us to losing our humanity. 

Not only for us but also for the generations yet to come.

Be kind , but be aware.

#Conundrum

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17 thoughts on “Manipulation or Kindness”

  1. I think we’re hypocrites

    to a large extent saying what we want upfront seems the easiest way to get rejected.
    we want the fantasy, the idea, never the real because real is boring, unattractive, mundane.
    I guess that’s the way it is. which makes you wonder why. doing the right thing means you’re cheesy or corny like no one expects anyone to be that great or cool
    so they try to categorise you in order to feel comfortable. if they can’t figure out what your deal is they say you’re fake

    in my opinion I would say it’s a psychological reprogramming from numerous influences
    the home, neighbourhood, school, peer pressure etc. all this boils down to the inevitable outcome “insecurity” the one force that has changed everything

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Absolutely true Dr Reno!! self-deception, amongst us and insincerity is our biggest problem… He who aims to please everyone will always fail💯

      Liked by 1 person

  2. This piece touches on an issue which is quite commonplace nowadays, the fact that you articulated it so well makes it easier and easily understood. Kudos for this one

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Excellent post… I agree with your thoughts… and this excerpt truly resonated with me:

    It’s a world of half truths , selective kindness and lies. Family dynamics is no better than workplace politics that pits people against each other and condones betrayals whilst it laughs at loyalty as an antiquated relic.

    I still want to believe in the kindness of strangers (as Lana del Rey says in her song “Ride”)… but at times, it seems quite naive given our “values” as society…

    Sending best wishes! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Trying to love oneself is a fool’s errand. In looking out only for ourselves, we cut ourselves off from the source of power: the gifts of themselves that others have made to us. We die thinking “I was more powerful than anyone else,” without realizing that we were far less powerful than we could have been.

    Liked by 2 people

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